Friday, October 01, 2004

Cranking it Back Up

After a brief lull in the obesity epidemic sing along, the organ grinders, and their monkeys, are back out on the street spreading doom and gloom, while candy bars are shrinking, and Jack Daniels is being watered down, right at the distillery no less.

A new study, is promoting the idea that parents and the government need to attack the obesity “epidemic” as if it is some contaigious disease which individuals can pick up by looking too longingly at a fast food restaurant or pausing too long at the candy counter at the local Stop n’ Rob.

Not content with simply encouraging personal responsibility among individuals for shoving too much food into their mouths, the State sees, with their all encompassing insight, the battle against obesity to be a legislative matter.

“Childhood obesity has reached such epidemic proportions that it can be reversed only by a coordinated effort touching everything from new zoning laws that promote parks and sidewalks to tougher regulation of ads aimed at kids to more physical education in schools, the Institute of Medicine said yesterday.”

Well, if the supposed obesity problem is so epidemic, the State should grab the bull by the horns and proclaim, via the law, that from now on Americans must embrace the Luddite philosophy, ban all labor saving devices, foods with sugar, and mandate a 3 hour exercise period each day.

Here’s your gruel, citizen, now, jumping jacks, begin.

Posted by John Venlet on 10/01 at 05:38 AM
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