I Can't Stand This

I’m fairly certain most individuals are aware of another looming hot coffee lawsuit. This time the lawsuit lottery contributor is, hoped, to be Starbucks.  The attorney, representing the wheel of fortune spinner, states,

"I thought, ‘Oh, great. Another McDonald’s coffee case,’” Marlen said. “Once I sat down and talked with her, I realized this was different."

Right, Mr. Marlen.  I’m wondering if you actually meant “Oh, great.  Another McDonald’s coffee case,” this means I’ll score 30%, or more, of a nice, fat settlement.

Marlen again.

""This was not an accidental spill,” Marlen said."

They never are, are they?

Here’s why the case is “different,” according to Marlen.

"There was something wrong with the cup,” Marlen said. “Somebody should have caught that."

Maybe you can coerce Starbucks into serving coffee only in children’s sippy cups. They are made of high quality plastic, it appears, and, my experience with them, has shown that only minimal amounts of liquid are released no matter how much abuse a child gives them.  I would even give toddlers McDonald’s or Starbuck’s coffee in them, if they liked coffee and it wouldn’t have them bouncing off the walls.  Though I wouldn’t have to worry about the young’uns getting a coffee burn.

I’m wondering if the plaintiff, Molly Alter, is simply a klutz and has a problem chewing gum and walking at the same time also.

"The coffee spilled after Alter walked 20 to 30 feet from the store."

Judas priest.  This is absolutely asinine.

Via The Obscure Store.

Posted by on 01/27 at 09:37 AM

  1. I like the sippy cup idea.  Starbucks lids seem to gather moisture that seeps through.  Then you tip the cup and, voila, a drip falls on your nice shirt!  Seriously.  There’s got to be a class action in there somewhere.  Are you with me on this?

    As to your response to learning of this claim, John, you might be interested in the psychological labels that get attached to such attitudes.  They are summarized in http://domesticdiversions.com/index.php?p=151&more=1&c=1

    Posted by  on  01/30  at  05:32 AM

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