"Can't Spare A Square"

The ridiculousness of life imitating inane art is soaring to new heights, today, with Sheryl Crow’s global warming blatherations resembling an old Seinfeld episode titled The Stall. You know the one, wherein Elaine needs to, ahem, dab the dribbles from between her legs while in a public restroom, but the person in the next stall “can’t spare a square.”

Crow, whose musical talents I have a tendency to enjoy, is “proposing,” on her current “Stop Global Warming College Tour,” the following in regards to toilet paper usage:

I have spent the better part of this tour trying to come up with easy ways for us all to become a part of the solution to global warming. Although my ideas are in the earliest stages of development, they are, in my mind, worth investigating. One of my favorites is in the area of forest conservation which we heavily rely on for oxygen. I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don’t want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required.

Judas priest, Sheryl, stick to making music, you’ll probably save alot more paper squares.

As reported in a Washington Post article titled Saving the Earth: The Biodiesel Bus Blog

Posted by on 04/23 at 05:42 AM

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